Hungarian Police...they will steal your child and robberate your house

So I've been spending the last few days of my life in Budapest, Hungary with Andy, and needless to say, it's been rather awesome.

for those who don't know, Hungary looks like this:

Budapest is that larger dot in the middle. I'd show you what the city looks like, but I haven't uploaded any pictures yet.


Even though I've only been here two days, I've seen/done quite a few things that I would never have expected. The first day, we got lost and saw some medieval sword fighting school, where I took a picture of a dude in armor through a window. Yesterday was especially exceptional, after climbing the hill on the Buda (west of the Danube) side of Budapest (yes, there's a Pest too, it's on the east side of the Danube. So Buda+Pest=Budapest, clever, huh?) and taking some pictures of the wonderful view from above, Andy and I decided to walk about town and to take a tram. Once on the tram, we encountered a quite...well, crazy woman who decided to take this time on the tram to complain about the evils of the Hungarian police.......in very Hungarian sounding English. Quotes include: "I never elect, because they need to be changed," "If there is a crime....Hungarian Police," "You'll get a stroke from Hungarian Police," and the title of this post is also one of her claims. As people got on at each stop, more and more people were weirded out my this lady's antics. Did I mention she was old?

Then, last night Andy and I decided to travel to Margaret Island, a small island in the middle of the river towards the north of the city. I thought that Andy getting hit on by hookers in Prague was just a coincidence, but now I am fully convinced that he is what I refer to as a "hooker magnet". We were asked no fewer than 8 times whether we wanted to participate in some gross looking woman's "Sexy Program." We were also approached by a man asking if we wanted to meet "The Fuck Master," referring to the Master's talents as "precision FUCKing technology" (emphasis on the "fuck" syllable). That had me laughing for about ten minutes.

Eventually we got to the island, and decided to participate in the festivities, which were essentially open air bars/dance clubs, and it was truly a neat experience. We apparently happened to come on "Remember those 90s songs?" night because in a row, they played "Ice Ice Baby", "U Can't Touch This", "Pump Up The Jam", and "Everybody Dance Now". So we drank some beer, ate some sausage with bread and mustard, which was quite delicious, and drank some semi-sweet white wine because Andy is a girl. We danced like idiots for a while, and then decided to head down to the river's edge to slowly make our way back to the hostel. We sat for a little while, and then we were suddenly joined by a group of boys who were toying with the idea of going swimming. Eventually about four of them stripped down to their underwear, jumped in the water, and immediately bitched about how cold it was. We laughed at them for a while, but then decided we should move on, but we wanted to walk around the southern tip of the island. There, we saw a cat, and decided we wanted to follow it a little bit, essentially because we're a little gay and like to pet animals. We couldn't catch the cat, but we did see it leap over a fence to a very quiet looking area, so we decided that we should do as Hungarian cats do, and also climb the fence, Andy got his belt loop caught on a spike, and I poked my but with one, and it was funny.

Once inside, we looked around and to our surprise, right there was a small pool. We looked at each other, knowing exactly what the other was thinking. Then I stuck my hand in the water, came to a wonderful realization, looked at Andy and said, "Dude, it's warm." Yes, we had successfully broken into a small bar with a hot tub completely concealed from any people who may have been looking to keep such people like us out. So we stripped down, and had a wonderful time in our own personal Hungarian hot tub. The only downside was that they had turned off the beer taps for the night.

After our swim, we decided it was time for us to return home at the lovely hour of 5AM to sleep until noon, and prepare for the following day.